Perspective...

A couple days ago, I had a huge aha moment, and it startles me. Something I have always struggled with is my self-esteem, for lack of better terms. I grew up believing that I was too fat to have anyone truly love me or  be successful in life. Worse than that, I believed that I was a curse to the world around me. Having been a Christian since I was three years old, I would have told anyone else the truth from God's Word -- our Creator does not make mistakes and He made you. "I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Ps. 139:14). However, I did not believe this about myself. I chose to believe the lies of Satan for many years. I have been hurt an awful lot over the years by a number of individuals. I am a very sensitive person, and this is both my greatest strength and weakness. It is a weakness, as you can see, because I tend to take things too personally and think about things too much. However, it is also a great strength because I can often sense when someone is hurting long before others, and I often know what to do or say to help. I have a very tender heart toward all creatures.

Anyway, back to my aha moment. I realized that the way I view and value myself will most definitely be reflected in my girls' view of themselves! Yikes! I have such power to shape their little hearts and minds in so many ways. In every thing I do, say, and think, they will be watching me. What greater motivation to work on this issue that has haunted me throughout life. I have been working in that direction for several years now anyway, but I need to be more purposeful in my thought life. I need to focus on Scripture and "choose to listen to the voice of truth" as the Casting Crowns song says. I need a Bible-based understanding of who I am. We all have these insecurities, we all have downfalls and weaknesses. I am choosing to face those and work on them. I am choosing to focus on who I am in Christ! I am not perfect, and I make plenty of mistakes. But those who truly love me will overlook those in the spirit of love covering a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). I now have in my life exactly who I want to be there and who wants to be there. I do have many strengths and positives to offer this world, beginning with my family! I truly believe that ministry begins with your own family, then expands slowly to your church family and out into the world. But that is another post... I encourage you to also look to the Lord for how you are viewing yourself and your place in this world. <3